Why can't we have a qualified Referee for all of our Youth games? - Julian Carosi, England Wiltshire Class 1 Referee.

OK, let me set the scene, I am 10 minutes into the first half of the Under 10's Youth Cup competition, and so far I have had very little Refereeing to do. Suddenly, for no discernible reason at all, little 'Bradley's dad has decided to continually walk up and down, two yards inside the pitch, and right in front of all the other parents on the touch line.

"I say walk, but what I really mean is - have you ever seen those athletes on television who participate in 'walking' races? Not so much a walk, but a sort of funny shuffling pace.

Bradley's dad is oblivious to everything but the blue mist that has descended in front of his eyes. Anyway, I am totally distracted from the game action itself. Little Bradley casts some furtive and frightened looks towards his dad. His eyes are beginning to glaze over, his head drops. Bradley's dad continues with his funny walk and tirade of meaningless instructions to his son, interspersed with the usual pleasant expletives for the Referee, every time a decision is made against his son's team.

Bradley mumbles "Oh shut up dad". I' m glad that Bradley's dad cannot hear him - I dread to think of the consequences. But Bradley is right SHUT UP DAD !!!!!!!!!

Are you beginning to get the picture?

Officiating at 'Youth' games can sometimes be likened to being attacked with a double-edged sword, not only do you have the dissenting players to contend with, you are very often given the extra bonus of parent abuse! And all for no extra cost.

"So it is not all doom and gloom."

After a very long-playing career at local level, I have now been Refereeing at local level, in the English County of Wiltshire for a number of years. Why did I decide to become a Referee? Probably the same reason as everyone else who is involved with football - because I love the game, and for no better reason.

The views expressed throughout this article are my own personal views. They have no relation to any Referees Society or County Football Association. Nevertheless, it is an insight into some of the real problems that we Referees have to face. There are a number of Referees who are totally committed to Youth football, and I admire them for their fortitude. A close Referee colleague of mine, is the local Wiltshire County Youth Referees Appointment Secretary, and he is one of the best Referees in the County totally dedicated to Refereeing both Youth and Senior football. There are also a very dedicated band of Youth Team officials and parents dedicated to improving the relationships within youth football - so it is not all doom and gloom.

But officiating in youth matches is not my 'cup of tea'. - And I'll explain why.

Refereeing can be a thankless task. When you travel to a game, you are mostly alone against 22 players 6 or more substitutes, managers, spectators and the Parents. This role can be very daunting, and is not for the faint hearted. Contrary to popular belief, Referees are human. When first arriving at the ground, we like to be sociable, yet at the same time; we must not be seen to favour a particular team. This means that Referees can sometimes seem aloof. This is one way of distancing ourselves from being over-friendly, because experience has told us that no matter how friendly you are, it only takes one incident in the game to turn pleasant everyday people into what can best be described as 'monsters out of control'.

"It's not really my cup of tea"

I belong to my local Melksham Referees' Society. We organise three of four Referee training weekends throughout each year. I assist our dedicated Chairman in delivering this training. This takes up the whole of Saturday and Sunday (0900-1830) each weekend. The training is provided free of charge, and the instructors are NOT paid. Of the approximately 15 candidates per session, about half have come from a Youth Football background, some of them being parents, some players, some managers, some Club Linesmen etc.....

In a normal year, the Melksham Referees' Society will have trained up to about 40 or 50 new candidates. At a very rough guess - about half of them (say 25) actually go on to start Refereeing, the remainder being content with just learning the Laws. After a year or so, we will be very lucky to have 10 out of the 25, who are still Refereeing. The others will have already decided that the abuse is just not worth it. Counteract this, with the ever-increasing departure of our experienced Referees, and you will begin to understand why there are 'just not enough Referees to go around'.

A number of our candidates are teenagers, who go on to officiate in the local youth games. These new recruits are the seeds of the next English Premiership Referees. They need all the encouragement and protection that can be provided. Some of these 14 or 15 year old Referees are very efficient and confident. I would never have dreamed, or dared, or been brave enough to be a football Referee at that age. They can only be admired.

Regardless of all the recent Law changes, Football is still a very emotive physical contact sport, it thrives on high passion and emotions - long may it stay that way. I am a great believer, that the mistakes made by Referees (and players come to that) are an actual integral part of the game itself. Take away the mistakes, and you might as well stay in and watch your kids playing draughts (checkers in America!). Nevertheless, Referees are very genuine people, striving to make little or no mistakes in each game. But it is impossible to be perfect, and to be honest, anyone who tries to be is a fool. I always aim to be relaxed and fully concentrating - and most of all FAIR. Like the majority of Referees, I'll sometimes hold my hands up - we do make mistakes, but we also try very very hard, on the field and off the field, to do our very best. There is a whole Referees' world apart from the game itself. We hold Society meetings, seminars, conferences. We get involved with training, officiating at friendly matches, attending disciplinary hearings, sorting out our masses of correspondence, providing information (For instance, I have just launched a new Referees' Training Web site) etc. etc...... The 90 or minutes you see, are just the sharp end of the wedge as far as a Referee's responsibilities and freely volunteered time is concerned. And sometimes, we even get time to spend with our family at the weekend!

"There are 'just not enough Referees to go around".

There is no easy solution for improving the relationship between Referees, players, parents and Team officials. The malaise is symptomatic of society in general. Manners have long been forgotten or not taught. Respect - well, that no longer exists these days. That is not to say that we can all do our own little bit to improve both our own lifestyle and 'football'. How difficult would it be for Team managers' to insist that youth players shake the Referee's hand after every game - especially if the game has not been to their liking. Why can't the team managers always welcome the Referee cordially, and thank him after the game, irrespective of the result. I have had many an irate manager or player venting their anger at me after games. I'm big enough (6ft and 15 stone) to look after myself, but I do worry about our youth Referees and the increasing departure of our experienced long standing Referees. I too, have considered 'packing it all in' on several occasions - all due to abusive behaviour received whilst officiating.

I am not advocating that football should only be played by perfectly behaved players in front of robotic parents - of course vent your emotions, but not in an openly aggressive and abusive manner. Our children will be the ones who suffer in the long run.

In a normal season, I will officiate in 60 plus football matches, of which maybe 5 are Youth games. And to be honest, on the whole, I do sometimes enjoy the pure football (football for enjoyment's sake) played at youth level - you can't beat the smiling face of an eight year old who has just scored his team's winning goal. There are other Referees (thankfully) whose games are nearly all Youth fixtures, and I admire them for it. But like I said before, 'it's not really my cup of tea', but I wish it was???????

I'll stick to the grown-ups - at least I only have a single edged sword to contend with!

As you travel through life, we try and do our own little bit to improve humanity. I can assure you that Referees are a totally dedicated, underestimated and above all very human group of people, corporately trying to improve their lot!

AT THE VERY LEAST, GET YOUR YOUTH TEAMS TO ALWAYS SHAKE HANDS WITH THE REFEREE AFTER THE GAME - IT IS CERTAINLY APPRECIATED BY THE REFEREES.

Regards,

Julian Carosi

What do you think? How do you handle abuse from the side line? Comments and suggestions regarding this article are appreciated please email suggestions@asktheref.com

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